I am a teacher

After typing my "About Me" profile at the right side of this page, I got distracted reading that darn book again. The author, Phillip Done nailed it... This one just made me laugh, tear up, talk aloud to myself, smirk, and sigh. I bet you all can appreciate it too.

"I have sung "Happy Birthday" 657 times.

I hand over scissors with the handles up.

I can listen to one child talk about his birthday party and another talk about her sleepover and another talk about getting his stomach pumped last night--all at the same time.

I fix staplers that won't staple and zippers that won't zip, and I poke pins in the orange caps of glue bottles that will not pour.

I put on Band-Aids and winter coats and school plays.

I say "Cover your mouth," after they have coughed on me.

I am a teacher.

I examine new braces and new blisters and holes in mouths where teeth have just fallen out.

I wear 4-leaf clovers and dandelions in my shirt pocket that have just been picked with love at recess.

I spend Thanksgiving vacation writing report cards, Christmas vacation cleaning my classroom, and summer vacation taking classes on how to relax.

I push in chairs all the way, push swings higher, and push sleeves up while children are painting.

I say, "Use two hands!" when they carry their lunch trays. I say, "Accidents happen," after they did not use two hands.

I wear green on St. Patrick's Day, red on Valentine's Day, and my bathrobe on Pajama Day.

I poke straws into juice boxes and untwist thermos lids that are too tight. I unpeel oranges that are too tight too.

I attend soccer games and Little League championships and funerals for guinea pigs.

I answer to both "Mom" and "Dad".

I am a teacher.

I have worn green marker, red paint, yellow chalk dust, glue stick, and glitter all on the same day.

I hate glitter.

I have spelled out because and beautiful and friend six million times.

I am a teacher.

I have given 842 spelling tests and have written "Have a Good Summer!" that many times too.

I collect milk boxes and coffee cans and egg cartons.

I can make a telescope out of a toilet paper roll and a totem pole out of oatmeal boxes. I can make snowflakes out of coffee filters and a space shuttle out of a Pringles can too.

I know when a child does not understand. I know when a child is not telling the truth. I know when a child was up too late last night. I know when a child needs help finding a friend.

I am a teacher."

~32 Third Graders and One Class Bunny by Phillip Done